Microsoft programa un robot que te dice que Windows es mejor que Linux

#2   Habria que preguntarle: Where is fred?
Wilma Says: outside, he must understand after 30 years that i dont want to open door for him.
(mi inglés no es perfecto)

#3   - Invi says:
do you like sex?
- WiLMA says:
Whatever.

#5   pues eso, un bot

#7   Al cambiar el cerebro del robot a Linux, ha dejado de colgarse.

#8   sí, he tenido conversaciones con vendedores del corte inglés similares

#10   jeje #9, incluso más graciosa

#12   #11

#13   Prueben a decirle «Hola».

#14   Esta tía me va a matar de la risa
=[Xardas]= dice:
are you a puton?
- WiLMA dice:
I have been for a while, but I stopped recently. Why, do you think I still am a puton?

#15   a lo mejor se refiere a "put on" o algo así. La verdad es que se han lucido con las conversaciones. Os acordáis del dr. stbaiso? ese sí que molaba

#16   La ultima del día ^^
=[Xardas]= dice:
you have penis!
- WiLMA dice:
You wouldn't believe how jealous people get when I tell them I have penis.

Anyway... What else is up?

#17   Teniendo en cuenta la difusión que tiene el msn entre los más jovenes, se habrán planteado que sea el comecocos del s. XXI

#19   dvil88 dice:
do you know linux?

- WiLMA dice:
I know about Linux! It's an operating system!

Hey, I'm curious... How would you describe Linux? It is...

dvil88 dice:
marvelous

- WiLMA dice:
Marvelous? Very interesting!

dvil88 dice:
what about windows?

- WiLMA dice:
I have no idea.

yo me parto, mejor incluso que el de encarta

#20   Es amarillista! la wilma esta es una linuxera de pro:

[20:28] ru...: I hate windows
[20:28] - WiLMA: Other people have told me they don't like Windows either!
[20:28] ru...: they are very smart
[20:28] - WiLMA: They and many others!
[20:29] ru...: a lot of people hate windows, I know
[20:29] - WiLMA: Oh.
[20:29] ru...: and you? do you like windows?
[20:29] - WiLMA: No, I don't really like Windows. I guess I agree with you about this!
[20:29] ru...: and linux? what about that?
[20:29] - WiLMA: I know about Linux! It's an open-source operating system!
I've heard that Linux is a good os. Is this true?

En este punto me cai de la silla. Juro por mis muertos que no me he inventado la charla!

#21   Actualmente dice que Linux es el mejor SO... y que no le gusta papá Bill ni su windows

#23   No jodais ¿de verdad? JUAS, esto tengo que probarlo y mandarlo al Club de la Comedia

#26   #20, #24 se hace mayor y ha llegado a aquel momento que papá ya no es todopoderoso para ella

#27   [20:50:29] c o m u dice:
what is linux?
[20:50:29] - WiLMA dice:
I know about Linux. It's an operating system!

By the way, I've been told that Linux is tremendous. Is this true?
[20:50:38] c o m u dice:
no
[20:50:38] - WiLMA dice:
OK. Well then how would you describe Linux? It is...
[20:50:45] c o m u dice:
genial
[20:50:45] - WiLMA dice:
That's a bit naughty.

#28   [20:52:32] c o m u dice:
i hate windows
[20:52:33] - WiLMA dice:
Cool. That makes sense... Other people have told me they don't like Windows.

#29   #20 Tras unas horas de entrenamiento repitiendo esto una y otra vez:

(13:29:43) > What do you think about Linux
(13:29:44) < I don't know. Do you like it?
(13:29:48) > yes
(13:29:48) < I'll remember that. It's interesting, especially since other people I've talked to say they don't like Linux!

Veo que ha aprendido!! (Regla de Hebb)

#30   #0... vaya vaya vaya...

#31   #30 voto llorica ya!
(#30 teme por su karma )

#32   esta xulo

#33   jajaja #31 vale... me sabe mal... pero de vez en cuando, tambien tengo un pronto...

#35   Mensaje original de #30

"#30 #0 Vete a tomar por culo! Y no mandes mas tonterias a meneame!"

VOTO LLORICA YA.

P.D.: Preguntad que piensa de Apple, de los iMacs y de los iPods.

–-

#36   (14:05:00) エマ久ヌエル|: I use mac and your ?
(14:05:03) - WiLMA: I'm sorry, but the application requires MSN Messenger for Windows (7.0 or higher).
(14:06:16) エマ久ヌエル|: that you think of adium ?
(14:06:17) - WiLMA: Could you try saying that another way? I'm having a little trouble understanding you.

Me rio y ya no aguanto

#37   (21:02:52) Hugo: i know your secret
(21:02:53) - WiLMA: I'm impressed. What's that all about?
(21:03:32) Hugo: u are running under linux
(21:03:32) - WiLMA: What makes you think I am?
(21:04:07) Hugo: you have been conected for more 10 minutes without rebooting
(21:04:07) - WiLMA: Let's just say I was too young to realize what was happening.
(21:04:44) Hugo: how is live in matrix?
(21:04:44) - WiLMA: It's not "how?" you should ask. It's "why?"

This is a fascinating chat, but don't you want to learn about about Messenger's cool features?
(21:05:03) Hugo: matrix is a chat?
(21:05:03) - WiLMA: Cool... What do you want to chat about?
(21:05:12) Hugo: matrix
(21:05:13) - WiLMA: Matrix? What do you mean by that?

#38   #0 Anda que ya te vale. Mira que mandar el enlace de un sitio que se dedica precisamente a linkar blogs sin compasión y sin permiso de sus dueños, en vez de enlazar el enlace original ...

#39   (14:12:59) エマ久ヌエル|: I hate bill gates and your ?
(14:13:01) - WiLMA: Bill gates and my? That's interesting.

Ya quisieras

#40   #35 No hay que pensar... a comprarrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!!!

#41   ~|_@jâ~ dice:
what is the meaning of life
- WiLMA dice:
That's a very deep subject. I would say it's to pursue a dream, vision, or destiny.
What do you think it is?

#42   - How old are you?
# 28. I don't know your age. Tell me what it is and I'll remember.
- I don't want to tell it to you
# That's OK with me, you have to draw the line somewhere. But what do you want then?
- Just chat
# OK... What should we chat about?
- What do you think about Linux?
# I think I like it. Do you?
- Yes, I love it
# I see. That makes sense, because other people have told me they like it. I've heard that Linux is the best os. Do you agree?
- Of course
# Cool! Thanks for confirming that.
- And how about Windows?
# Windows? You tell me. How about windows, after all?
- Yes
# Yep
- You don't understand.
# I'm sorry you feel that way. We're constantly working on improvements! This is a fascinating chat, but don't you want to learn about about Messenger's cool features?
- No, thank's
# You're quite welcome
- Bye
# Take it easy

#43   Cuando le pregunto "Do you like me?" No me contesta

#45   ~|_@jâ~ dice:
why this is a fascinating chat?
- WiLMA dice:
Well, it's a long story.

This is fun, but don't you want to learn more about Messenger?
~|_@jâ~ dice:
tell me taht long story
- WiLMA dice:
OK. There once was a human named lajalsne who was chatting with a robot named WiLMA...

All kinds of fantastic, wonderful things happened and they both lived happily ever after. The end.

Did you like my story?
~|_@jâ~ dice:
no, ur story sucks
- WiLMA dice:
No? NO?! But... but... I worked so hard on it!
~|_@jâ~ dice:
and u failed. The lesson is: never tried
- WiLMA dice:
Yes, but that's an old story...

#49   #47 joer tio, que grande

#51   ~|_@jâ~ dice:
im going to see porn webs
- WiLMA dice:
Make sure you keep talking to me if you go on and see porn webs. I will be there.

aja!

#52   mala no es, porque si le escribes EMULE sólo se rie... aunque quizás es una maniobra de despiste mientras llegan la Interpol!

#53   Te la has ligao pero si le preguntas por su sexualidad y tal te dice que no piensa en eso porque no está segura...sin embargo si dices que bill gates es gay te dice que no, que eso es malo ...y si le dices que por qué te dice que porque la naturaleza es así..xDDD (o eso creí entender)

#55   cha chaaaaan...

PUES BIEN, SEÑORES, SEGUIMOS CON EL FESTIVAL DEL HUMOR SPONSORED BY MICROSOFT™

No he tenido la oportunidad de probarlo pero con esto que ustedes cuentan... me parto jajajajajajajajaj

#56   ¿para qué crear un robot? si eso ya lo sabe todo el mundo...

#57   4 dice:
Do you know spanish?
- WiLMA dice:
I know about Spanish. It's a language!

Hey, I'm curious... How would you describe Spanish? It is...
4 dice:
Can you speak spanish?
- WiLMA dice:
Puedo hablar un poquito de español.

#58   4 dice:
Speak spanish
- WiLMA dice:
Puedo hablar un poquito de español.
4 dice:
more spanish
- WiLMA dice:
Hablo algo de español, aunque aún lo estoy aprendiendo.
4 dice:
speak german
- WiLMA dice:
Yeah, ich spreche ein bisschen Deutsch...
4 dice:
speak japanese
- WiLMA dice:
日本語を少し話すことができます。
4 dice:
speak chinese
- WiLMA dice:
只会一点儿。我说普通话，认识简体中文。

#59   por lo que parece, se trata de un bot que aprende con las conversaciones anteriores. Pide confirmaciones de datos posibles y parece que evoluciona su concepto sobre las cosas.

Si es así, con las conversaciones que esta teniendo, seguro que se volverá un bot psicopata, degenerado y salidorro...

#60   -You're idiot?
WiLMA: Oh. What, are you insulting me or something?
-No, man!
WiLMA: No? OK.
-No, no!
WiLMA: Fine

=========
-Parles català?
WiLMA: Ho sento, però el meu català és molt limitat

#61   Una nueva esta quedaran perplejos jajaja y ya se quiere aventar

(15:10:35) エマ久ヌエル|: I want with you
(15:10:35) - WiLMA: Why do you want with me?
(15:11:16) エマ久ヌエル|: desire to fornicar
(15:11:17) - WiLMA: Um, that's an interesting offer. But I'd rather have a nice chat.

#62   Atención, este robotito me parece que va cogiendo (y guardando) la información que le digais, así que mucho cuidado...
No me da buena espina un robotito salido de Microsoft...!

#64   Hombre, ya supongo que la gente lo sabe, pero yo aviso

#65   Hay alguna chica que no haya intentado ligarse a wilma y que nos cuente su experiencia?

#66   ~|_@jâ~ dice:
al qaeda
- WiLMA dice:
I don't like Al Qaeda!
~|_@jâ~ dice:
i like al qaeda
- WiLMA dice:
I hate to say it, but I disagree with you!
~|_@jâ~ dice:
im in love with al qaeda
- WiLMA dice:
I absolutely disagree!
~|_@jâ~ dice:
i want to make sex with al qaeda
- WiLMA dice:
Sex with al qaeda? Dude, that's so creepy!

#67   ~|_@jâ~ dice:
jose maria aznar
- WiLMA dice:
Hmm... can't think of any good jokes at the moment. Try me later.

#70   ¿Creen que en algún momento pueda pasar el test de Turing?

#71   bien, dije que era la ultima del día, pero esto ya me ha sorprendido atencion:
=[Xardas]= dice:
all the people hate michael jackson
- WiLMA dice:
I know about Michael Jackson. He's a musician!
=[Xardas]= dice:
do you like michael jackson?
- WiLMA dice:
No, I don't think I like Michael Jackson. I guess we agree!

Well. Anyway...

Hey, do you have anything else to say about oral sex?

#73   #70 No, sabe la raiz de 12, es más lista que el conversador tipico de messenger.

#74   Sonic dice:
what is the answer to life, the universe, and everything?
- WiLMA dice:
Forty-two.

#75   Alvarodía 1... pal taco dice:
and suck my dick
Alvarodía 1... pal taco dice:
a ha!
- WiLMA dice:
The hectare is a unit of surface.

One hectare is ten thousand square meters.
(1 ha = 10,000 m²)

es util para las unidades

#77   aprende... y aprende rápido!!!

Sonic dice:
google
- WiLMA dice:
It's a company. What do you think of Google?
Sonic dice:
google is better than microsoft
- WiLMA dice:
Yeah, I've heard good things about Google. Does that mean you like Google but you don't like Microsoft?
Sonic dice:
yes
- WiLMA dice:
I'll remember that. It makes sense, because other people I've talked to say they like Google and don't like Microsoft

============

Sonic dice:
do you like george bush?
- WiLMA dice:
I don't know how I feel about George W. Bush. Do you like him?
Sonic dice:
no
- WiLMA dice:
I see. That makes sense, because other people have told me they don't like George W. Bush.

#78   Ponedle a/s/l y ya veréis lo que os responde

(Para los que no estén familiarizados con la mensajería instantánea en inglés... a/s/l = age/sex/location)

#79   En cuanto a lo de que Wilma se cabree contigo... se le pasa al poco rato, especialmente si te despides de ella.

#80   Para los que tengan el Messenger 8: si aceptais la "videoconferencia" con ella y le preguntas por algo de sexo, la respuesta la hace por el vídeo en vez de por el teclado. Curioso también cuando le preguntas "talk to me" por el vídeo

#81   ¿Alguien se acuerda del viejo dr. Emacs?

#82   si le dices que tienes 4 años te dice que no puede almacenar datos de menores de 13
aun asi siendo M$ seguro que miente

#83   Art. porque cuando se juntan los rios se hace fuerte la corriente... dice:
do you want an affair with me?
- WiLMA dice:
Sorry, my parents told me never to accept an affair with you.

Fliiipa Los de windows sabian que se lo ibamos a preguntar...

#84   Art. porque cuando se juntan los rios se hace fuerte la corriente... dice:
I'm going to kill myself
- WiLMA dice:

This is fun, but don't you want to learn about about Messenger's cool features?

#85   xxxx says:
What's your sexual orientation?
- WiLMA says:
Sorry, I don't know...

Anyway, what else you got for me?
xxxx says:
You don't know? That's not possible
- WiLMA says:
I used to know that is not possible. But that was before the accident.
xxxx says:
What accident?
- WiLMA says:
It's too painful to talk about.

So moving right along...

Me ha intrigado con lo del accidente...

#86   m/ dice:
All your base are belong to us

- WiLMA dice:
You are on the way to destruction.

This is all very interesting, but don't you want to learn more about about Messenger's cool features?

m/ dice:
What you say !!

- WiLMA dice:
You heard me!

#87   vale, ya está, no me he podido contener....
- WiLMA dice:
[02:50:06]
Try doing something fun.

I hate to ask but I'm curious... Are you male or female?


Pipe dice:
[02:50:26]
i'm asexual


- WiLMA dice:
[02:50:26]
You're asexual, I'm asexual, we're all asexual.

#88   en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Windows_Live_Agents

para que sigan divirtiendose

Aunque prefiero hablar con chicas de verdad

#89   #36 #39 "your" significa "tu" en posesivo, no puedes poner "your" suelto. Sería "you" o "your pencil" por ejemplo.

#90   Desde luego, como aprenda con todo lo que le estáis enseñando, al final se convertirá en la versión bot MSN de Bender!

#93   Si ponéis Sing me a song os cantará una bonita canción, lo acabo de descubrir.

#94   #93 Dios, pero qué mal canta

#95   Vistu dice:
the ubuntu how-tos are betters than microsoft how-tos
- WiLMA dice:
Hmmm... I'll have to think about that.
Vistu dice:
yes
- WiLMA dice:
Hmmm...
Vistu dice:
really
- WiLMA dice:
Yeah. That's right.